Escape plan
Question
I'm 17 and I've been suffering physical abuse at the hands of my father for a long time. The violence has been getting worse as I get older and he's now started to threaten to kill me. I'm frightened and want to get away from him.
I've no family or friends I can go to and basically I have very little money. I do have some savings but my dad says I can't have access to them and won't let me have any of my official, personal documents. He's told me no one will believe me if I tell them what's happening and has even come with me to the hospital when he's hurt me to make sure I won't say anything.
Do I have any rights and what any help can I get with housing? Am I entitled to any support at all? Please help me, the situation has been making me so depressed that it's ruining my life.
Answer
I'm sorry you're going through such a difficult situation at home and it's completely understandable you're frightened. Unfortunately, it's not uncommon to suffer violence at home but because of this, there are many organisations that can help you.
You asked about what help you can get with housing and there are a number of options you can try. If you can, it's best to find somewhere to go to before you actually leave home and it's good to choose a time when you can get away safely, for example, when your father's at work.
One option is to try a women's refuge. A refuge can provide a safe place to stay (often at short notice) while you sort out something more permanent. Workers at a refuge can also help you sort out your longer-term housing and money situations. They will also give you support and will accept and understand what's happened to you and will protect your confidentiality. You can find a useful list of items to take with you to a refuge from Women's Aid, but if you can't get hold of any personal documents then the refuge workers can help you apply for new copies. There are refuges all over the country, and you can find out about getting a place in one from the Women's Aid helpline on 0808 2000 247. They can also help you talk through your feelings and your options.
Another option is to make a homeless application to the council. As you're 17 the council is likely to have a legal responsibility to provide you with advice and accommodation. This help might be provided by social services or by the housing department. You can find the number for both departments in your local yellow pages. The council should decide you are homeless because it isn't reasonable for you to carry on living at home. You'll need to tell the council about what you've been going through, but they shouldn't ask you to prove what's happened, and they shouldn't get in touch with your father. They should find you somewhere to live where you won't be at risk of further abuse.
If you don't want to stay in your local area, then because you're suffering from violence at home you can apply to any council in the country. You can get contact details for councils, as well as help in making a homeless application, from a local advice centre or from Shelterline on 0808 800 4444.
A further option would be to apply for supported housing, such as a Foyer. Foyers provide housing, training and support for young people. There can be waiting lists for supported housing so you may want to get into some safe accommodation before applying.
Finally, when you find somewhere to stay, you may be eligible for housing benefit to help pay the rent. You may also be entitled to claim benefits to pay for living expenses. To find out more about what benefits you might be able to claim visit your local Citizens Advice Bureau or other advice centre.
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Question answered by Shelter
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